[OT} What *not* to say at Lord of the Rings

[Gryphin]

What not to say at Lord of the Rings
1. Stand up halfway through the movie and yell loudly: Wait! Which one is Harry Potter?

2. Block the entrance to the theater while screaming: 'YOU SHALL NOT PASS!'

3. After the movie, proclaim loudly: "Lucas could have done it better!"

4. Play a drinking game where you have to take a sip every time someone in the movie mentions "The Ring."

5. Ask everyone around you if they think Gandalf went to Hogwarts.

6. Finish off every one of Elrond's lines with "Mr. Anderson."

7. When Aragorn is crowned king, stand up and start singing "And I did it....MY WAY!"

8. Talk loudly like Gollum all through the movie. At the end, bite off somebody's finger and fall down the stairs.

9. Dress up as old ladies and re-enact "The Battle Of Helms Deep" Monty Python style.

10. When Denethor lights the fire, shout "BARBECUE!"

11. In TTT when the Ents decide to march to war, stand up and yell "RUN, FOREST, RUN!!!!"

12. Every time someone kills an Orc, yell: "That's what I�m TOLKEIN about!"

13. During a wide shot of a battle scene, yell: "Where's Waldo?"

14. Talk loudly about how you heard there's a single frame of a nude Elf hidden somewhere in the movie.

15. Start an Orc sing-a-long.

16. Come to the premiere dressed as Frankenfurter and walk around like everybody else is confused.

17. When they go into the paths of the dead, wait for a tense moment and shout "I see DEAD PEOPLE!"

18. Loudly imitate what you think a comversation between Gollum, Dobby and Yoda would sound like.

19. Release a jar of Daddy-long-legs into the theater during the Shelob scene.

20. Wonder out loud of Aragorn is going to run for Governor of California.

21. When Shelob appers, loudly exclaim how Charlotte has really let herself go!

22. Three quarters through the movie loudly ask your neighbor "Which one is Michale Flatley and when is he going to dance?"

Edit: forgot the [OT]

[ December 22, 2003, 19:20: Message edited by: Gryphin ]

[narf poit chez BOOM]

when Gandolph knocked denethor out when the jerk was yelling "Fall Back!" we had some spontaneus clapping and a few cheers.

who's Dobby?

19. Release a jar of Daddy-long-legs into the theater during the Shelob scene.

that could be REALLY funny. maybe i should try that...

i can't beleive no one found this funny:
http://lavendereyes.rivkashome.com/m...ry&storyid=128

[ December 22, 2003, 19:16: Message edited by: narf poit chez BOOM ]

[Ed Kolis]

23. Keep referring to Gandalf as "Ganondorf"

24. Refer to the Ring as "the Bling-bling"

25. (FotR) Call Strider "Boromir" and vice versa

26. Whenever Saruman appears, boo, hiss, and throw eggs at the screen

27. Constantly say "Shhhh! I'm trying to catch up!" while reading the books

28. Insist that Sam is a girl

29. Insist that *GANDALF* is a girl!

30. Say, "They could have won a lot quicker if they had Phased Polaron Beams"

edit: more!

31. Pronounce Gimli's father's name as if you were saying "groin" with a Chinese accent...

32. Quip that if the elf found some building blocks he'd have to change his name to Legosome

33. Refer to said elf as "Link"

34. Give all the dwarves nicknames like "Sneezy" and "Doc"

35. Complain that the elves are too %@(! TALL! They should look like the ones on the Keebler cookie bags!

[ December 22, 2003, 19:43: Message edited by: Ed Kolis ]

[narf poit chez BOOM]

36. every time they show the Ring, yell "WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!"

37. refer to your popcon/pop as 'my precciousss'.

38. wistle 'taps' each time the rohan charge.

39. play 'taps' on a bugle each time the rohan charge.

40. yell 'LOOK OUT!' 2 seconds before every close call, because you've seen it before.

41. 'i can't beleive this isn't AoTC' or other appropriate movie.

this thread should be labelled *SPOILER*

[ December 22, 2003, 21:03: Message edited by: narf poit chez BOOM ]

[Starhawk]

42. When you see the Southrons marching into Morder (TTT) start singing Ohhhhweeeohh like the guys from Wizard of Oz .

43. Refer to the orcs as "Da boyz from da hood" ala spike lee.

44. When the orcs start dying cry loudly "Not my poor little gobby"

45. When the Wraiths get swept away (FOTR) start playing "I get knocked down" by chumbawumba.

46. Dress like Arwen (even when your a guy) and demand that the first bearded person you see kiss you, then hand him a cheap copy of the "Evanstar" and walk away weaping softly...

[ December 22, 2003, 21:09: Message edited by: Starhawk ]

[narf poit chez BOOM]

and this definitly deserves a mention

47: http://www.gamespy.com/comics/nodwick/ffn/ffn.htm

[Atrocities]

48. Ask if anyone plays SEIV
49. Ask the White wizzard sitting in front of you to take off his hood.
50. Comment on how fake the CGI work looks.
51. Root for Gollum
52. Laugh out loud at the elf while he is jumping around the elephant.
53. Point out obvious plot errors.
54. Point out obvious filming errors
55. Stand up and yell, "NO!! DON'T GO IN THE CAVE YOU IDIOT!!"

EDIT More
56. Say out loud, Man this would make a great game
57. Say out loud just before the Orcs charge, "Ancient treaties stipulate that this white city belongs to eye."
58. Confirm that Sam is a girl
59. Confirm that Gandolf did go to Hogwarts.
60. Ask where Sam and Fortos (sp) shoes are.

[ December 22, 2003, 22:26: Message edited by: Atrocities ]

[narf poit chez BOOM]

53. Point out obvious plot errors.
54. Point out obvious filming errors

[serious][curious] did you spot any? aside from places where they didn't stick to the book, i mean.[/serious][/curious]

and it's Frodo.

[Kamog]

Originally posted by Gryphin:
6. Finish off every one of Elrond's lines with "Mr. Anderson."

LOL. This is the best one!

When I first saw FOTR, I remember seeing his face and thinking, "hey, I've seen that guy somewhere before - it looks so familiar!" but it took me several minutes of thinking to suddenly realize, it's Agent Smith!

[Starhawk]

Originally posted by Atrocities:

60. Ask where Sam and Fortos (sp) shoes are.

Hobbits don't wear shoes and they never have