Ye Olde Galactic Bar & Grill & Phong's Head Cantina

[Saxon]

All this talk of karate has helped me come up with yet another brilliant idea. Instead of having a SEIV duel to sort our Tigga and Gyphin, we will have them duel in person. Some of you may have seen the Sumo Suits which are often present at fun fairs. They are giant rubber suits that look like Sumo wrestlers and weight a ton. Once you wear one, you waddle into the ring and then face off against another person, similarly encumbered. The testosterone will be crackling and they can fight it out with no risk to their teeth and mustaches.

It seems to me that this would balance the pair out and give them a good method of sorting out affairs. I also think it would be great fun for the rest of us to see them waddling around wearing rubber suits.

Oh, the Young Ones was crap, but Have I Got News for You is delightful.

[Growltigga]

Saxon, that is probably unfair on Gryphin as I weigh in at 18 stone (100kgs which I think is about 220 pounds for you Yanks) - Gryphin looks far more svelte than that and I would have an unfair weight advantage, as well as being much better looking, suave, sophisticated, stylish, hair-free etc

I suggest an underwater duel with suckerdarts or a paintball challenge

The Young Ones was brilliant at the time. Same as Blackadder, at the time, hysterical, now, a little jaded perhaps

Another brilliant idea Saxon?? when was your first one?

[ May 23, 2002, 10:50: Message edited by: Growltigga ]

[dogscoff]

not sure, I feel Shotokan spends far too much time copncentrating on kata and not enough on power combinations and defence mitts

It depends where you train. The first place I trained (Coventry Uni - very good club) we had a proper punchbag (one of the full-size, heavy-as-a-person ones hanging from the ceiling), mits, and every Sunday we'd have a 2 hour session devoted to kumite and working on the bags & mitts. Where I am now, the kata and technique is superb but they consider bags & mitts completely unnecessary and turn their noses up slightly at the mere suggestion.

Personally I don't think you can learn to punch and kick properly if you never actually make contact with anything. how do you know you're doing it right otherwise?

I still wouldn't do full- contact though.

As for power combinations... I would argue that they're not really necessary- I've been taught that the whole ethos of Shotokan is that you only need to hit them once.

[dogscoff]

Oh, the Young Ones was crap,

*Gasp* ... Blasphemy!

I loved the Young Ones, and still do. It mightnot be the mid-80s any more but the slapstick and anarchy is timeless. Every time I see Mike nail his legs to the table I crack up.

Not to mention the stupid one-liners:

Viv: Mike, what's good for a hangover?
Mike: Drinking heavily the night before.

Peasant #1: What's new?
Peasant #2: Microchip technology.

[Growltigga]

Where I am now, the kata and technique is superb but they consider bags & mitts completely unnecessary and turn their noses up slightly at the mere suggestion.

That is always the way - many clubs will concentrate on kata and how Daz-white their gi are - not enough actually concentrate on the power aspect of it - I am 6 foot and 18 stone, what the hell am I going to do with kata - my whole style is close-in power combos (and biting if I am really in trouble)

Personally I don't think you can learn to punch and kick properly if you never actually make contact with anything. how do you know you're doing it right otherwise?

Dogscoff, we agree on something. Unfortunately, my wife also thinks this is correct and that I am the punchbag.

I still wouldn't do full- contact though.

I think I am now officially retiring from full contact now. My weight says that I fight heavy/super heavy categories whcih usualy means the Dolph Lundgrens of this world - they put their hands on my head and hold me off that way

As for power combinations... I would argue that they're not really necessary- I've been taught that the whole ethos of Shotokan is that you only need to hit them once.

I disagree. To get that perfect strike in that disables your opponent is fine for Jet Li in a movie, but you try and do it IRL - the only strikes that will work that way are some of the lethal attacks and you cannot exactly do those round Bournemouth for long. Power combos disable an opponent and do it fast.

[Saxon]

Tigga,

I would suggest leaving a paint ball fight off your list of duels with Gryph. After all, he is American and is likely to have genetic skills in the use of guns. You wouldn’t challenge a Brazilian in football or a Canadian in a moose kissing contest, so don’t run the risk of a gun slinging match with an American with a Wild West Mustache.

I also have a technical question for you. At what dan do you learn the Glasgow Kiss?

[dogscoff]

That is always the way - many clubs will concentrate on kata and how Daz-white their gi are -

Definitely sounds like you need to find a new club. I know for a fact that what you are looking for *is* out there. I have no idea what is available where you are but I'd have thought you'd get a pretty good selection being in a major urban centre as you are.

not enough actually concentrate on the power aspect of it - I am 6 foot and 18 stone, what the hell am I going to do with kata

Well... to be fair, kata isn't supposed to be taken quite so literally - it's a way of practising and remembering techniques, and the skills you learn from kata should be transferrable to whatever techniques and combinations you like. That said, you do need a balanced training regime, or you'll have nothing to transfer the skills to.

- my whole style is close-in power combos (and biting if I am really in trouble)

Well then maybe you do need to try a different martial art. Perhaps some of the grip/twist/hold/break ones. Aikido? Kung-Fu has some cool maneuvres. I think you'll find that kick boxing is even more long-ranged than shotokan.

I think I am now officially retiring from full contact now.

I can't imagine why you got into it in the first place.

I disagree. To get that perfect strike in that disables your opponent is fine for Jet Li in a movie, but you try and do it IRL - the only strikes that will work that way are some of the lethal attacks and you cannot exactly do those round Bournemouth for long. Power combos disable an opponent and do it fast.

I guess it depends who you're up against. You fight in the arena against other martial artists. For me, that would be a means to an end rather than an end in itself, so maybe we're not aiming at the same target.

The most likely situation for me to get into a fight would be with some beered- up idiot falling out of a pub. I might well run into an experienced bruiser but it's unlikely that I'd come up against anyone with any real martial arts training- I'm just too placid to get into a fight with anyone who has the patience to train regularly.

In that case (ie they are more drunk and less trained than me) I think there's probably a reasonable chance of landing a "perfect" (or at least good enough) strike. "Good enough" doesn't necessarily have to mean a KO either - just enough to make them think again or at least give me room to finish them off.

Street-fighting comes down largely to luck anyway - who you're up against, what weapons they have, how many mates are stood behind them, how determined they are to hurt you, how much everyone has had to drink... these are all pretty much random variables. The best you can do (other than avoiding the fight in the first place) is to arm yourself with a technique that is geared towards real combat rather than competition and/ or meditation and/ or impressing girlies. I think Shotokan fits that description.

Wow... I can really ramble, can't I?

[Growltigga]

Saxon, you must remember that Americans do not have more intrinsic ability with guns than any other race in the world - what they do have is an innate ability to get overweight, put on combat fatigues and run around their house going 'hut hut hut' whilst practising swarm dives and keeping enough weaponry in their garages to equip a modest latin american revolution. They also tend to drive jeeps with 'Neighbourhood Watch types do it in bunkers" stickers or something similar stuck on the back.

Us Europeans just have little old ladies looking through net curtains

You learn the 'Glasgow Kiss' at 9th Kyu. This is the same time that you learn to say, in a Scottish accent, "Has your mother got a sewing machine?, well tell her to stitch that".

You also learn that 2 smashed bottles (1 in each hand) is a great equaliser and that a half brick in a sock is one of the most fearsome street weapons you can face.

[mac5732]

aahhh you youngsters, all this violent talk of fighting, you should take it from us older, mature, suave, domesticated, sexy, persona's of the world. The fighting I enjoy the most, is when you cuddle up and do the smoooochyy technique with a very endowed fillie, now that my good GT and Dogscoff leads to a lot more enjoyment than standing toe to toe bashing in each others grey matter. Aahhh you youngsters still have a lot to learn I must say...

Saxon, I see that you are feeling better, that is a glorious revelation, Glad to see your back and feisty as ever.

Mephisto, you are quite right concerning the bill, have you ever seen what a lawyer charges, when one opens that formal piece of paper, the intake of oxygen becomes enormous to the point one cannot breathe, thus nothing more can be said until after much rest and meds..

Dogscoff, I also agree, join in the Galactic extraveganza where we ply the universe with our weapons of conquest.

lets see now, we have a Puddy Tat, Fluffy Bunnies, a Gryphin, a Doggie, a Sauce maker, and a suave, mature, gentle, lovable, congenial, sexy, debonair, scientific person of the world, so far in the game. Hmmmm this is one diversified group I must say... (Tesco, is your friend still going to play,)?

be careful, be very very careful
look to the sky
its "THEM"

just some ideas mac

[Mephisto]

Originally posted by mac5732:
Mephisto, you are quite right concerning the bill, have you ever seen what a lawyer charges, when one opens that formal piece of paper, the intake of oxygen becomes enormous to the point one cannot breathe, thus nothing more can be said until after much rest and meds..

You see, it was very wise of me to be a lawyer so I can give my vitim the bill and then be a paramedic to charge him right again for the much needed help.