Phong's Head Cantina [TM] - Starfury Sector (A Wretched Hive of Scum and Villainy)

[General Woundwort]

Along a noisy street in a spaceport under construction, a bearded stocky fellow in a flight suit walks with a Peter Lorre-looking chap following behind. They pause in front of a three-story domed titanium building, which looks like a cross between the B5 Earthdome and the Sydney Opera House.

"Hmmm... how strong is the construction of this place, do you say?"

"Class-V reinforced titanium girders with cores of pure adamantium," the Lorre clone replies. "It was originally intended to house the local Rapid Response battalion, but they got transfered closer to the tarmacs."

"Good, good, it ought to hold up to the punishment then... the location is good."

"Excellent, sir! Right along the main strip from the tarmacs to the downtown sector."

"I've got eyes, you know. The asking price?"

Lorre hands him a UWW pad. Woundwort looks it over. He hands it back.

"85%, final."

"Sir, you cannot be serious. Such a sturdy building in a choice location, I cannot let go for anything less than 9.."

"85. That's firm. And you're not ultimately dealing with me. My Boss will have final say on the price. If you want to try your hand at bargaining with him, you're free to do so."

Lorre looks up at Woundwort, back to the building, and back to his UWW pad, which currently displays the portrait of a nasty-looking felinoid.

"85%."

"Good. A pleasure doing business with you."

Lorre walks off with a scowl as Woundwort looks the building over again.

"Well, it's no Bavarian brauhaus, but the location's good, and she's definitely tough enough. Hopefully the Boss will approve."

Woundwort turns and motions to several droids hovering at a respectful distance. They zip up to the building and begin attaching panels to the front, near the main entrance. Their work is soon completed, and the droids follow Woundwort off to the tarmacs.

The panels come to life (holographic poster Boards), displaying the following information...

COMING SOON TO THIS LOCATION

THE PHONG'S HEAD CANTINA[TM] - STARFURY SECTOR
A fully licensed and wholly owned subsidiary of
The Ye Olde Phong's Head Cantina and Bierkeller

Growltigger (Owner, CEO, HFIC)
Woundwort (Manager)

Secondary Construction and Interior Design by Efrafa Enterprises, Efrafa IV

HELP WANTED

- unidentifiable aliens of all kinds as background extras

- bartenders

- Emergency Medical Response personnel (at least 5 years combat experience required)

- Musicians and singers (proof of current life insurance required)

Enter application in the virtual keypad below; you will be contacted for an interview.

[ September 20, 2003, 11:34: Message edited by: General Woundwort ]

[Growltigger]

Growltigga checks out the freehold title to the new cantina site, and quickly gets a legal mortgage executed and registered over it.

One does have to protect one's investment one knows

[General Woundwort]

Originally posted by Growltigger:
Growltigga checks out the freehold title to the new cantina site, and quickly gets a legal mortgage executed and registered over it.

One does have to protect one's investment one knows

[whew. The Boss approves the new site. One big hurdle cleared. Now for the next step...]

From the direction of the main space terminal, the drumming sound of marching feet can begin to be heard over the background noise of the construction of Starfury. From the haze and smoke, the figure of Woundwort appears, walking toward the future home of the Phong's Head. Materializing behind him, a small army of construction droids, carrying tools, boxes, and all manner of technological odds and ends. As they march by, an electronic humming can be heard.

"Oooh-eeee-oooh, e-oooooooooooooo-oh. Oooh-eeee-oooh, e-oooooooooooooo-oh. Oooh-eeee-oooh, e-oooooooooooooo-oh."

As they approach the entrance to the Phong's Head, Woundwort punches some buttons on a clunky-looking wrist computer. The doors to the Phong's Head slide open, and the columns of droids march into the building, continuing to hum their tune.

"Oooh-eeee-oooh, e-oooooooooooooo-oh. Oooh-eeee-oooh, e-oooooooooooooo-oh. Oooh-eeee-oooh, e-oooooooooooooo-oh."

As the Last droids duck into the building, Woundwort follows them in. The doors slide shut.

From within the building, even over the background noise, a dull roar of construction sounds can be heard.

[ July 10, 2003, 13:25: Message edited by: General Woundwort ]

[Raging Deadstar]

*Raging Deadstar slowly saunters down the highstreet hunching his trenchcoat firmly to himself before noticing the large building. he walks over to the virtual screen and types in his details.*

"Position Desired: Security

Qualifications: A variety of Weapons, A years expirience in the Cantina lifestyle, a host of genetically modified bouncers (lean, sleek, attractive female ones too ) and 1 genetically modified battlesquid (thanks to dogscoff) If things get too rowdy Barry the T-rex can be drafted in for bar control, fees to be paid occordingly!

Contact: The dark gloomy corner in the Ye Olde Phong's Head Cantina and Bierkeller"

*With that entered he walks away down the street into the night, hoping to add his piece to cantina history...*



[ July 11, 2003, 22:28: Message edited by: Raging Deadstar ]

[General Woundwort]

Late at night, a dark and drizzly night straight from Blade Runner, Woundwort and the foreman construction droid stand outside the Phong's Head. The dull roar of metal saws, las-torches, and other machinery can be heard from within the Cantina even at that late hour. But at this time our two heroes are intently focused on two hoverdroids who are maneuvering a huge sign over the main entrance. They lower it into place, slowly, and then it is magnetically locked-in. Several smaller droids quickly work behind it to connect it to the building's main power grid. One of these droids gives a thumbs-up. Woundwort nods, then speaks into his wrist computer.

"Switch it on."



The foreman droid looks up at the sign. "It looks interesting, but if I may ask, why isn't it a hologram? And what is that tubing in the 'Phong's Head' lettering?"

"It's neon light bulbs."

"Neon?!?"

Woundwort smiles. "It's a continuity thing. You wouldn't understand."

A smaller droid, who up till now had been doing a datadump of the holoposters, floats up to Woundwort and prints out a message from its "mouth". Woundwort looks it over, then turns to the foreman droid.

"You're back in charge here again. I need to go back over to the Home Cantina for some business."

[ July 14, 2003, 01:25: Message edited by: General Woundwort ]

[General Woundwort]

Woundwort trudges back towards the Phong's Head, watching as a convoy of supply trucks rumbles towards the rear cargo entrance. He notices a Toydarian hovering near the front entrance. He motions him around to the side alley.

"Hey, Woundawort, I'va gotz the droiza you asked... hey, you no looka so good. Whazzap?"

[pause] "...have you ever seen a Class II felinoid in a toga?"

"No, thata I hava to say I haven't. Dohnna want to either."

"You got that right. Did you say you have the battledroids?"

The Toydarian shows a nasty grin. "Thatza right. Good ones, too. What with the Star Wars franchise agoing to the pits, you'va got quite a bargain. Lotza the pinwheel combat droids, a-tweaked to youra specifications. We stilla gotta deal?"

Woundwort pauses, thinking of the implications of Deadstar's comments to the Boss...

Also i would hire my own staff (fully combat trained female bodyguards and bouncers)

"You're darn right we have a deal."

Woundwort reaches into one of his pockets, pulls out a checkbook, and draws up a check from the Traveller's Aid Society... from his own personal account...

[ July 14, 2003, 18:45: Message edited by: General Woundwort ]