OT - Scientific News Flash
 

A major research institute has recently announced the discovery of the heaviest element yet known to science. This new element has been tentatively named "Administratium".

Administratium has 1 neutron, 12 assistant neutrons, 75 deputy neutrons, and 111 assistant deputy neutrons, giving it an atomic mass of 312. These 312 particles are held together by a force called morons, which are surrounded by vast quantities of lepton-like particles called peons. Since Administratium has no electrons, it is inert. However, it can be detected as it impedes every reaction with which it comes in contact. A minute amount of Administratium causes one reaction to take over four days to complete when it would normally take less than a second. Administratium has a normal half-life of three years; it does not decay but instead undergoes a reorganization, in which a portion of the assistant neutrons and deputy neutrons and assistant deputy neutrons exchange places. In fact, Administratiums mass will actually increase over time, since each reorganization causes some morons to become neutrons forming isodopes. This characteristic of promotion leads some scientists to speculate that Administratium is formed whenever morons reach a certain quantity in concentration. This hypothetical quantity is referred to as "Critical Morass".

Re: OT - Scientific News Flash
 

I don't know whether if this is fact or fiction...

[ December 14, 2002, 00:38: Message edited by: TerranC ]

Re: OT - Scientific News Flash
 

Gandalph, ALL hail you, and OXymoron! For bringing a discovery of such magnitude to our (at least my) attention! Being what I would consider a fairly Scientific person. The fact that I had overlooked this discovery, is almost unforgivable! I do Thank You again, every so much for this post! And will be checking in for any possible UpDates.

mlmbd http://www.shrapnelgames.com//ubb/icons/icon6.gif http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif

Re: OT - Scientific News Flash
 

This would be even funnier if I didn't work for this organization... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/image...s/rolleyes.gif

Re: OT - Scientific News Flash
 

this is a problem of galactic proportions as i also work for this organization.

Re: OT - Scientific News Flash
 

&#1 NEWS FLASH &#1

Since the discovery of Administratium, this reporter has researched and has now uncovered a few interesting facts.

1. Many reports reliably suggest that Administratium is known to leave evidence of its existence. Even in it's most primitive forms, Administratium is known to leave a very visible trail consisting of massive amounts of paper. Much of this paper comes in triplicate or even quadruplicate.

2. If you see such a trail, DO NOT approach. For some as yet unknown reason those who approach too closely become bound up with RED TAPE. There are rumors that some red tape victims remain bound for months and even years.

This reporter will try to confirm these facts and learn more...

&#1 END NEWS FLASH &#1

Re: OT - Scientific News Flash
 

http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/shock.gif

Thanks for the laugh!

Re: OT - Scientific News Flash
 

Nice addition Taz!

Re: OT - Scientific News Flash
 

I think just about everyone here works for one, knows someone that works for one, and has been severely annoyed by one.

Re: OT - Scientific News Flash
 

I used to be annoyed by the presence of Administratium, but I've come to the realization that when you reach the right mass of Administratium, it forms the compound "CFEP", also known as "Contractor Full Employment Program". After all, someone (usually LOTS of someones) have to be paid to track the mass of Administratium. And, since it moves so slowly, tracking it is a pretty cushy job. Not very exciting or fulfilling, but certainly stable. http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/icon10.gif And a stable paycheck is a good thing... http://forum.shrapnelgames.com/images/icons/tongue.gif